SPOCK'S COCK: BOLDLY REWATCHING

Captain Ignaz Wisdom of the starship Spock’s Cock, at your service. Come aboard as we rewatch TOS, in original production order, and blog about it, occasionally while drunk.

Episode Recaps

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TOS: The Doomsday Machine
"The commander is responsible for the lives of his crew, and for their deaths. Well, I should have died with mine."
Apart from Uhura and Chekov being missing, this episode is basically flawless, and it doesn’t get nearly enough recognition. It’s so good, in fact, that I can’t think of any way to make fun of it. So I’ll just let bironic do it:
Kirk: What attacked you??
Decker: It was the giant Bugle chip of doom!
But in all seriousness, we have a great story (ever since Melville first wrote it) executed with genuine tension and terror, with great acting and—giant space Bugle aside—believable effects. I love gorns and unicorn dogs and pink stalactite dildos, but it’s nice sometimes to watch episodes where the props aren’t ridiculous. Also it’s just cool as hell to see another Constitution-class ship like the Enterprise. And:
Kirk dressing left and looking foxy in his wraparound, jury-rigging the Constellation like it’s nothing because he’s not just a pretty face (although oh, what a pretty face) and he knows these starships like the back of his hand;
Spock being totally cool and collected (and looking oh so lovely) as he deals with Decker and with Bones, the line “Vulcans never bluff,” acting against Decker only when Kirk orders it, and somehow, without breaking character, looking like he’s about to cry when Kirk announces his plan (“Jim. You’ll be killed.” WAAAHHHH);
Scotty saving the day, as always, like multiple times in this episode, despite “Captain, I still don’t know what we’re doing!” and actually swearing at the Jeffries tube after the transporter shorts out again (although I’m not sure what he says: Netflix thinks it was “bonkers!” which … LOL);
McCoy being furious with the whole situation, yelling at Decker (“Doctor, you are out of line.” “So are you! … Sir.”) and at Spock (“Spock! Do something!”);
Sulu being professional and competent (and still having the fixation with countdowns that we saw in earlier episodes) and also sweating bullets during the episode’s climax;
William Windom is terrific as Commodore Decker; his anguish and madness are really believable. (bironic: “Man, I wonder if Kirk would crack up like this if the same thing happened to his ship and crew. I don’t see him doing the hysterics, but I can see him catatonic.”) You want to slap him as he forces Spock to step down, but you can’t help feeling sorry for him—and he does figure out the answer in the end. And I had the same idea as bironic—how easily Kirk could end up in a similar situation, and how he would respond. (For those playing along at home, Commodore Matt Decker from “The Doomsday Machine” is the father of Captain Will Decker from Star Trek: The Motion Picture.)
Last thing: that look of UTTER LOVE that Spock gives (Sulu too!) to Kirk at the end, once Kirk has safely made it back on board the Enterprise.
WOW this got long, but I really love this episode, and you never see it on anybody’s lists of favorites.

TOS: The Doomsday Machine

"The commander is responsible for the lives of his crew, and for their deaths. Well, I should have died with mine."

Apart from Uhura and Chekov being missing, this episode is basically flawless, and it doesn’t get nearly enough recognition. It’s so good, in fact, that I can’t think of any way to make fun of it. So I’ll just let bironic do it:

Kirk: What attacked you??
Decker: It was the giant Bugle chip of doom!

But in all seriousness, we have a great story (ever since Melville first wrote it) executed with genuine tension and terror, with great acting and—giant space Bugle aside—believable effects. I love gorns and unicorn dogs and pink stalactite dildos, but it’s nice sometimes to watch episodes where the props aren’t ridiculous. Also it’s just cool as hell to see another Constitution-class ship like the Enterprise. And:

Kirk dressing left and looking foxy in his wraparound, jury-rigging the Constellation like it’s nothing because he’s not just a pretty face (although oh, what a pretty face) and he knows these starships like the back of his hand;

Spock being totally cool and collected (and looking oh so lovely) as he deals with Decker and with Bones, the line “Vulcans never bluff,” acting against Decker only when Kirk orders it, and somehow, without breaking character, looking like he’s about to cry when Kirk announces his plan (“Jim. You’ll be killed.” WAAAHHHH);

Scotty saving the day, as always, like multiple times in this episode, despite “Captain, I still don’t know what we’re doing!” and actually swearing at the Jeffries tube after the transporter shorts out again (although I’m not sure what he says: Netflix thinks it was “bonkers!” which … LOL);

McCoy being furious with the whole situation, yelling at Decker (“Doctor, you are out of line.” “So are you! … Sir.”) and at Spock (“Spock! Do something!”);

Sulu being professional and competent (and still having the fixation with countdowns that we saw in earlier episodes) and also sweating bullets during the episode’s climax;

William Windom is terrific as Commodore Decker; his anguish and madness are really believable. (bironic: “Man, I wonder if Kirk would crack up like this if the same thing happened to his ship and crew. I don’t see him doing the hysterics, but I can see him catatonic.”) You want to slap him as he forces Spock to step down, but you can’t help feeling sorry for him—and he does figure out the answer in the end. And I had the same idea as bironic—how easily Kirk could end up in a similar situation, and how he would respond. (For those playing along at home, Commodore Matt Decker from “The Doomsday Machine” is the father of Captain Will Decker from Star Trek: The Motion Picture.)

Last thing: that look of UTTER LOVE that Spock gives (Sulu too!) to Kirk at the end, once Kirk has safely made it back on board the Enterprise.

WOW this got long, but I really love this episode, and you never see it on anybody’s lists of favorites.

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